The Myth

When the ancient lights flickered, 

Still hanging onto the dark quilt,

You held my hand and vowed for a lifetime,

Around us, the brown barks and greens shimmered,

Witnessing the birth of a once-in-a-lifetime love,

And the dim ring now held onto my finger,

Like how the air refused to leave your wrinkly lips.  

 

We stood at the edge of that cliff,

Taking precariously precious walks through memory lanes,

Painting each other with unending love,

 Reluctant to let go, impatient to consume, 

Anchoring our worlds against the oddest of odds,

A spectacle, 

A marvel, 

A wonder, 

And now I'm alone at that cliff with your untouched colors. 

 

I hang onto the smiles you painfully pushed out, 

I hang onto the words you tearfully extended, 

The ring on my finger, now so heavy, 

Pulls me into the reality of a world devoid of you,

And now I look for your presence in captured pictures, 

Like an abandoned puppy looking for its owner. 

 

When the petals of a pinkish dawn,

Kissed your long ivory  hair, 

The breaths we shared fluttered around shyly, 

Naked in the warmth of a springly embrace, 

The promises you whispered in my ear, 

Still alive and roaring inside me,

Dug their nails into my heart and bled out,

Like an unimportant fly squeezed by fingers to drain out life. 

 

Your hair flowed like a milky river, 

In the morning breeze, from the edge of the cliff, 

And as your magic soared, green lush flushed around us,

To all the seven mountains, as an elixir of life. 

The scents of tunes that poured out of your dizi,

And the spectacle of your silvery tang, 

Caught me in a mythical frame, 

Now I'm trapped in this fanged dream,

And the only way out is to bleed free. 

 

Like a kitsune devouring lives to live, 

To grow all nine tails for salvation from the creeping immortality, 

To finally meet my beloved, who was taken by the mortal sea,

Like a tear about to embark on a voyage to merge with sand, 

I'll wander the horizons, 

In search, 

In hope, 

In love, 

Till the end of all eternities, 

Until our worlds sink their canines into each other, 

And ooze into the love and life I'm bereft of.  

 

Mother

 Mother, I remember. 

When the carmine droplets rolled down, 

Eyes peered from under the hooded gown,

I forced a smile and nailed my feet,

On the floor that matched my beat. 

 

 A force you were, to be reckoned with,

My hero, as any child worships, 

You anchored me to this painted house, 

Forever and ever like a confined mouse. 

 

'Milk can't turn things white', you snarled. 

Milk is all I wished, what a time!

A pure white liquid with no efforts to make, 

Refused a right, that was so simple. 

 

A hero you were, wore long gracious gowns,

The laces drenched in rivers of regret,

Colored your feet with crimson cries,

When I laid there still, bare and battered. 

 

I remember, child.

One night, that blurred and slurred,

The dizzying heat, a conception in a rush,

The moment you left your cozy stay,

I offered, out of options and pay,

The dreams that danced stopped abrupt,

 And looked at me with fiery eyes.

 

You ended me, but I loved you.

I ended you, but I still loved you.

No fault of yours, but you still paid the price,

For the sins you bore from an unwelcome womb.

 

 I remember, mom.

I fathom the agony you possessed. 

I grasp the depth of your pit.

I realize the source of your tears.

But I follow your steps anyhow. 

 

You showered me with poisoned snarls,

Enslaved me in your grace and warmth,

Refused all, but taught to be quiet,

Entrapping me within this painted walls.

 

Now I wear those long gowns,

Roam around this large mansion,

Unable to leave the vivid visions,

 Always hearing your voracious voice. 

A Wish For You, After I Leave

 I will meet you, 

Where the earth rose up to meet the starry night,

Where the ground lights greet the dark air,

Where the sky rivulets flow down to touch sand. 

Alas!

If only we honor the things we wish...

My love,

Forgive me for the promises that never kept.

 

It was space that parted us first. 

Then time added onto that distance. 

We were a pair fated for separation.

We prayed to the Gods above and beyond,

To grant us a little closeness.

 

When I fly through the clouds,

I see the souls below,

Unaware of their endings,

Spending days in their happy ignorance.

 

I was one among them once, 

But I see my path's end now,

Closer with every inch of stroke of the towering clock,

With every inch my flight covers in this chilled air. 

 

An inch,

We will face an other, 

One more inch, 

We will merge with that other, 

Another inch,

We will rain onto the ground beneath,

As sparks and pieces,

With some purpose for the first time.

 

I see the ending.

I feel the ending.

As time nears,

I keep spiraling into unanswered thoughts,

Would this have been different,

If I had come another day?

If I had changed a seat?

If I hadn't smiled before getting in?

 

My love, 

This beloved is cruel,

For her to leave you hanging,

As she always does,

But for the last time.

 

I leave you alone in a world,

Where the glaciers melt,

Bombs rain,

Mountains murdered,

Forests burn.

 

After I'm gone, dear,

I want you to feel again,

How the cherry blossoms blushed when they saw the kiss, 

How the lonely maple tree came down to touch the unattended ice cream, 

The thick cold snow on the rooftop that you can't clear alone,

The umbrella under a scorching sun with shared sweats.

 

My love, 

This is my wish for you,

Before my soul departs...

Live a happy life,

Live a happy life,

Live a happy life.